New Year

Hello 2012.  Think you can beat 2011?  I'd like to see you try.

And, I mean that.  It would make for an incredible year if it could.  2011 brought so many amazing experiences.  I mean, seriously.  I had a baby.  How much more life changing does it get?

I've been doing some thinking on what my resolutions should be this year.  I know; I'm late.  Obviously I want to lose the baby weight.  That's a given.  I've lost weight before, so I know I can do it.  I guess I should also resolve to be more forgiving of my body than before.  Everything isn't exactly in its place anymore, and there's a good chance it never will be again!  So, other than the tried-and-true, I do have a few others in mind...

1 - Earn my PHR certification.  This has been on my "to-do list" for a couple of years now.  Every single time I would think about it and go to sign up, it was outside of the application periods.  I have set my reminders and I WILL take it this year.  Passing is a whole other thing. ;)

2 - Organize my house.  This has been a work in progress.  I've gotten much better at getting organized, but now that we're down a room I don't have any other choice than to become pro.  My goal is to truly turn our front room into an office, and the closet into an off-season clothing storage (but a good one).

3 - Pay off Michael's car.  We've both been paying early and extra on our car notes; and I'm pretty sure that if we push a little more, we could get his paid off this year.

Those are the resolutions I have that can be "weighed & measured".  I have others that are more internal; i.e. be more patient, be more forgiving, etc. etc.  Those are on-going.

So!  Here's to a great 2012! :)

And, a late Merry Christmas to you!

This year is quite possibly the smoothest Christmas we have experienced in our 10 years of being together.  Who would have thought I'd say that for Ethan's first Christmas?  It took having a baby.  Go figure!

I do hope everyone had a great Christmas (or whatever other holiday you like to celebrate!).

This month has come and gone way too fast.  I feel like we ran out of time for everything.  We didn't even get to decorate the tree until Christmas Eve, and it was after we put Ethan to bed.  Guess I lost my Mother-of-the-Year award.  I really wanted to make it a big family affair, so we kept putting it off.  Couldn't do it during the week because one of us was always getting home too late, and then it would be time for Ethan's bedtime routine.  Every weekend it was something else; we were all sick, my work Christmas party, Ethan's baptism, etc. etc...  I caved and let us get a fake tree this year.  Guess next year I'll have to cave and start decorating for Christmas before Thanksgiving.  :-/  Other than that, everything went ahead well.  As you can see, we were able to get Ethan's first picture with Santa (or, Bum Santa, as we affectionately call him).  Koopa's epic yawn gave us a fantastic Christmas card this year.

So, I have started Crossfit.  The first week left me unable to sit right to piss.  This week has been better.  I had planned to go back tonight, but ended up running over with my work obligations.  Tomorrow will probably not be any better, as we are going out of town to Lake Charles after Michael gets off of work.  I knew December was going to suck to start this stuff.  But, my intro marked the start of my month, which I did not realize before I did it.  Oh well, it's been an interesting jump start back into the fitness world!

Other than the tried and true lose weight goal, I don't have much figured out as far as New Year's resolutions.  Not care about people opinions as much?  Meh.  Who says you have to have a resolution anyway! ;)  Blog more? :D

UGH.

I feel like this post should be on my weight loss blog, but since I haven't been able to lose weight I guess it doesn't matter where it goes!

I'm so frustrated.  Everyone said that breastfeeding would burn so many calories.  I gained 30lbs while I was pregnant.  I lost 10lbs within the first two weeks.  Since then I have been at a hault.  Honestly, I want a quick fix.  Nursing Ethan means that I can't do that - which is good.  I don't need to crash diet.  I just hate being back at that place where I hate seeing pictures of myself and I hate looking in the mirror.  It is so depressing.

I went to my Crossfit intro, and I'm going back tonight.  I am not looking forward to it.  It's not that I'm lazy or don't want to get my sh!t together... It's that I feel like that fat chick that everyone will be staring at.

You are your own worst critic.  For me, that's a definite.

Our first ear infection

Sick babies suck.

Well, actually, sick babies are really sweet (at least mine is).  They snuggle and just want to be held.  It melts my heart.  But, knowing that my little nugget doesn't feel well really sucks for me.  He did really well this weekend for his baptism.  He napped on the ride over, was perfect through the ceremony and only started to get a little fussy at the end of picture taking because it was his lunch time.  Once I fed him, he was all smiles through lunch and then just watched the sky on the way home.  Sunday, he seemed like his normal self for most of the day (minus a runny nose), but started to feel warm that afternoon.  By the time we swung by Michael's parents house, he was fussy.  We gave him some children's Tylenol and kept him in bed with us last night.  This morning he seemed better, but still not 100%.  I made an appointment for him with the pediatrician this afternoon, and upon examination he found a small ear infection in his right ear.  I should have known because he was a little irritable nursing while on his right side a couple of times yesterday.  I'm just glad we caught it early.

So, I guess it's another first for my little guy.  Just wish it had been a happy one!

Where have the past 4 1/2 months gone?

Ethan is getting baptized on Saturday.  Yay!  Michael is so not excited to see his little man in a gown, but it's tradition.  And we all know how this Mommy is about traditions.  I did make a concession to have a second "boyish" outfit for him to wear for the family pictures afterwards.  The same priest that married us is doing a private ceremony for our family at his church.  It's out in BFE, but it's going to be extra special!

Moving on...
There is this thing called the 4 month wakeful.  I call it hell.  I kind of feel like if I hadn't read about it, it would have never happened - like I jinxed myself.  It all started when I made the STUPID mistake of being excited over a night of 10 hours straight of sleep.  The next night we lost count of how many times he woke up.  The next night dwindled to about 4.  Then, last night was only once, but he didn't go down until 10:30pm (two hours past his bedtime).  I can only imagine what kind of fun we get to have tonight.  We're trying to ween him off of the night feeding.  The first time he wakes up, he just gets some belly rubs and his pacifier.  If he wakes up a second time, I feed him.  I'm hoping that we grow out of this nighttime fun soon..

I can't help but to think that part of the problem is that we started rice cereal.  The pediatrician told us that if I want to continue to breastfeed, then I will need to supplement with iron in one way or another.  This means a) one bottle of formula fortified with iron, b) an iron vitamin supplement in a dropper, or c) rice cereal.  I thought we were taking the best route by going with rice cereal since that would give him some practice with a spoon.  Because of the two nights of issues, we skipped the cereal last night.  We'll skip again tonight and try back on Friday night.

One positive: Since Ethan was born, I was always the one to get up with him at night because I am nursing him.  Monday night, Michael got up with him since we are trying to ween the night feeding.  One of the several times he came back to bed, he curled up to me and said, "I have such a new respect for you after tonight!"  :)  I don't mind getting up with my little guy at all, but it was nice to feel appreciated!

Adventures in Nursing

We're talking about boobies, not the occupation. :)

So, as previously stated, I had the heebie-jeebies when it came to the thought of nursing while I was pregnant.  And, as previously mentioned, that all changed once our little guy arrived.  I thought the drama was going to end there.  Oooooh no.  That was just the beginning.

Let me tell you a little something about nursing.  Babies supposedly have a "natural instinct" about it, but their "natural instinct" sucks - as did mine.  I guess I thought that breastfeeding was the "cheap and easy" way to feed your child.  Well, it is cheap, but it sure ain't easy!  First of all, newborns need to eat every 2 hours, at least - including at night.  So, figure that around the clock for the first several weeks.  That means every time baby needs to eat, it's Mommy's job.  There isn't much that Daddy can do to help, besides being super supportive.  I am so grateful that Michael was!  The first two weeks were filled with lots of tears when it came time for Ethan to eat.  I felt like I was starving my child because he couldn't seem to stay with a good latch.  At his 2-week check-up, he hadn't gained all of his birth weight back, and that only made it worse.

The mornings were the worst because of being so engorged.  My titties became 2-ton round boulders.  Seriously.  The 3rd week of life, Michael went back to work and my mom came over every day to help me out.  I will never be able to thank her enough for everything she did.  She was the emotional and physical support I needed.  Because of the whole weight thing with Ethan, our pediatrician instructed me to pump and feed him for every other feeding, then breastfeed the others.  Within five days his weight was just where it needed to be.  It turned out to be a good thing, because it gave me a mini break from the emotional toll.  Once I knew my baby was perfectly fine, I could be more emotionally prepared to get back to breastfeeding.  It is so very true when they say that your baby can sense and feel your stress.  It's like Ethan was completely tuned in to everything I was going through.  When I was upset, he was fussy.  When I was happy, he was content.

By the time Ethan hit the 1-month mark, everything seemed to be flowing smoothly.  I was very fortunate that we had no issues with "nipple confusion".  Even now that I'm back at work, he nurses in the mornings and at night with me, and takes a bottle with my dad just fine.  I was blessed with the most laid back baby - as long as he's fed, he doesn't care where it comes from!  He must get it from his Daddy!

Now, onto the funny stuff.  Being a breastfeeding Mommy means getting creative.  So far, I have had to feed Ethan in a public bathroom twice and the car several times.  I'm not the type of mom who will whip her boob out and breastfeed anywhere at anytime, so those were interesting for me.  The first bathroom stint was because I forgot the nipple for the bottle we brought - then it turned out that I really didn't forget it!  That's the other beautiful thing about breastfeeding - ready-to-go meals, no supplies necessary!  In the car was a little easier because I could park out of the way and use a blanket.  The only "real" problem I have found is the possible squirting.  I have squirted Ethan in the face from being engorged, losing the latch for a split second, and on purpose just because he was being a turd. :)  In fact, one morning he had dried milk all over the side of his face from the drowsy 4am feeding.  All I could do was laugh.

We have been in the "sweet spot" of nursing for a couple of months now.  We're both confident in our skills and everything flows smoothly (no pun intended!).  Now that I'm back at work, I've been pumping to keep my supply going.  Over the past month and a half, I was pumping every single night.  This helped me build up a supply of over 200 ounces in our freezer.  Now, as long as I'm at least replacing what he eats while he's with my dad, I'm happy.  Breastfeeding won't last forever, and I want to be prepared in case I start to "dry up".  In the case that I don't, we haven't quite decided when to stop.  I'm thinking 6 months or at the first tooth! ;)

Breastfeeding is a very personal decision for any mom, but after my experience I am a very strong advocate for it.  I would never look down on anyone for not - hey, I didn't think I would!  But, I would say to give it a shot if you even think you might be up for it.  One thing that I treasure about it is the fact that it is the one thing that I can do for my child that no one else can.

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